Ok. It's the Snowpocalypse 2010. We get it. There is a shitload of snow outside. So much so that it has now prompted Channel 7 News to set up shop at the gas station by my house. That's right....we're famous, by virtue of precipitation. Fantastic.
So my friend and I decide that we are officially done with our cabin fever status, and that we're going to venture out into the end of the world that is Northern Virginia. I don't know about you, but I'm damn glad I made that grocery store trip the night before the avalanche to get all pertinent items......toilet paper, eggs, ingredients for chili, and then several other things that have absolutely nothing to do with surviving a snow storm. Please tell me how 3 kinds of potato chips and 2 kinds of popcorn help anybody with the impending weather, except me of course......but I digress.
Back to the previously mentioned gas station. I am there pumping gas because I'm an idiot and didn't feel like traveling to another gas station the day it started snowing. You see...this particular gas station's machines all of a sudden stopped working that day. Naturally, this enraged a few folks. This anger really just prompted laziness within me and I drove home that day, sans a full tank of gas in my car, which brings me back to tonight. While pumping gas, my friend and I see the Channel 7 News truck and the guys outside. I ask them if they have reports on the latest road conditions. The guy doing the reporting replies that they are doing that now, while the cameraman stays mute. He's clearly preoccupied.
Before I know it, Mr. News Reporter Guy is walking closer to me with Mr. Camera Guy following closely behind. They are now essentially keeping me company while I pump gas? Awesome. He asks me how old I am. Evidently, I look way younger than 29. "When you're 50, you're going to look 30. That's a good thing, trust me!", Mr. News Reporter Guy says to me. How sweet is he? Really. I know you can already guess what happens next. You will see some highlights below of how his little "so what are the roads like" interview goes down, none of which involves my friend because she absolutely refuses to get outside of the car:
Mr. News Reporter Guy: "So how are the roads?"
Me: "The roads are really bad. We got stuck getting out of my driveway!"
Mr. News Reporter Guy (already smirking, borderline laughing): "So then why didn't you stay home?"
Me: "Oh. Cabin fever like no other. There isn't enough beer, wine, or liquor to cure that so we're going to get some wings!"
Mr. News Reporter Guy (laughing at my ridiculous response but manages to pull it together for this next question): "What kinds of things have you witnessed so far with the roads?"
Me: "Well, we took a picture of a snow plow getting stuck on the way to Wegmans."
Mr. News Reporter Guy (really trying to put on a serious face at this point. I'm clearly NOT helping with this effort): "So you went out in this yesterday too? In a car that's not even 4-wheel drive?"
Me: "Well our neighbor has 4-wheel drive so we were all good!"
I also should point out that at one point during the interview I say "damn" then correct myself midway, but it is already too late. Mr. News Reporter Guy is already laughing and says we have to start that question over again. Oops. My mouth tends to get me in trouble sometimes. Of course, when I'm on national television, there is no exception to this rule. Although.....I'm sort of wishing otherwise. Ok, only slightly. Just saying.
This is classic YOU!! haha
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